Say What?

Don't ya just love the English Language? Words are pronounced and spelled different then you think. Or song lyrics...Sounds like one thing and it's another. That's why the Singing Bee on CMT is so funny! That is my life....For years I'll sing a song and come to find out I've been wrong all this time. My husband will hear me singing and just shake his head at me! A few months back we bought the new Reba cd and we were singing away to "Consider me Gone"
I'm singing:

If i'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose, If i'm not that arrow to the heart of you, If you don't get drunk on my kids....

Then I stop and think...get drunk on my kids....well that's weird. I grab the lyrics and realize...ha ha. If you don't get drunk on my KISS

(So on with the really long story that supposedly has a point!)

My inlaws come over every Wednesday night for dinner! I usually make something really yummy and follow with a kick booty dessert, but yesterday we were finishing up celebrating Mini Me's 9th birthday. She picked Matitos Mexican Food for dinner...so hubby brought home some fantastic Fajitas and all the fixins! Mini Me wanted me to make my Banana Pudding...(ok it's not mine, but Eagle Brand's recipe)

Ingredients

• 1 (14 oz.) can Eagle Brand® Sweetened Condensed Milk
• 1 1/2 cups cold water
• 1 (4-serving) package instant vanilla pudding mix
• 2 cups (1 pint) heavy cream
• 36 vanilla wafers
• 3 medium bananas, sliced and dipped in lemon juice

Instructions

• COMBINE sweetened condensed milk and water in large bowl. Add pudding mix; beat until well blended. Chill 5 minutes.
• FOLD in whipped cream. Spoon 1 cup pudding mixture into 2 1/2-quart glass serving bowl.
• TOP with one-third each of the vanilla wafers, bananas and remaining pudding. Repeat layering twice, ending with pudding mixture. Chill thoroughly. Garnish as desired.
• For fun individual pudding desserts for guests; prepare mixture and layers in individual serving dessert dishes or cups with stems. Serve chilled.

The oldest child just got his glasses yesterday and everyone was commenting on how handsome he looks. He would rather roll over and die b/c all he can think about is the ragging at school the kids are going to give him the next day. I tried to explain that no one will even notice. Then he reminds me he's 13 and yes the kids will notice...and that I have to say those things b/c I'm his mom!

(Rewind to realizing son was blind)

Sitting at Fuddrucker's for a family dinner...(one of our last ones since Demon baby doesn't sit still longer than 12 mins in a restaurant)
I notice this really funny sign while we are sitting eating and tell the kids to read it....

Oldest child: "What does it say?"

Me: "Well you tell me...."

OS: "I can't see it"

Me: "Ha ha real funny...read it"

OS: "I'm serious....I can't read the words...it's blurry. You can see that far?"

Me: "Yes....omg Gray....You've got to be kidding...that sign is huge....Omg you can't see...how long has this been going on?....hey other kids...read that sign to me...." (middle child reads it....Mini Me says she can see it but the words are too big, she doesn't know how to say them ) "Ok y'all are good....omg Gray Mommy is freaking out"

OS: "What? It's not normal to not see that far? All the kids walk up to read the board at school"

Me: "We're making you an eye appt"

Sure enough...the poor child is 20/80 and 20/60 in his eyes...I'm 20/20 so I just assumed all the kids were glasses free! I feel like such a horrible mom for not ever asking if the kids could see.
The eye store called and said the glasses were ready and so we picked them up yesterday after school. He was shocked at how many signs he could read from far away! I nearly wept w/happiness!

(Back to present)
So In laws are checking out the glasses...and Mini Me is telling the Fuddrucker's story again!


Mini Me: "Yeah there were really big words like Ominiousess...that I can't even say let alone spell"

(ok for starters I don't even know what word she was trying to say...and that word wasn't even close to being on the sign)

I hug her and say "that's cute honey"

My husband gets that 'ah ha I got you moment' look on his face. I can feel an embarrassing story coming on.

Hub: "Tell them your story"

Me: "What are you talking about?"

Hub: "The other night when you were trying to spell your word for your blog."

Me: "What word"

Hub: "Rampant"

Me: "Hush"

Hub: "No it's funny...all this time she thought the word was 'rampped' and it's 'rampant'"

Me: (face beet red) "Well it's not my fault... accents make it sound like the way I was spelling it. "

I think my hubby thinks I'm truly a blond under all my dark hair. I tell him he shouldn't complain b/c that means I need him around......to be my superstar of speech! ha ha!